-1-
Honesty is the … Only Policy
Chapter 1 – chap 2:4
If you remember Paul's first letter to this church, you will recall that he addresses problems and sins and irregularities in the church at Corinth. Some of his words were 'scorching' and seemingly harsh.
Here is an example: “ 1Co 6:1 ¶ “Dare any of you, having a matter against another, go to law before the unrighteous, and not before the saints?” …. and then verse 5 “I say this to your shame. Is it so, that there is not a wise man among you, not even one, who will be able to judge between his brethren?”
And another example: “1Co 5:1 ¶ It is actually reported that there is sexual immorality among you, and such sexual immorality as is not even named among the Gentiles — that a man has his father’s wife!” … and down to verse 5 “deliver such a one to Satan for the destruction of the flesh, that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus”.
He loved the church very much and yet he felt it necessary to come down on them with his 'apostolic' force.
It almost goes without saying that, his first letter being completed and carried to them … he would wait and wonder what their responses could be. Would they humbly listen and repent of their many church problems … their dis-unity, tolerating sexual sin in the church, arguing about who has the greater spiritual gift, in-fighting and suing one another etc.? Or would they read it and set it aside and nothing would change? Would he have to go there in person and see what is going on?
As we look at Paul's second letter to the Corinthian church we notice a connection to First Corinthians.
But let's just begin and allow the book to unfold itself to us.
2Co 1:1 ¶ Paul, an apostle of Jesus Christ by the will of God, and Timothy our brother, To the church of God which is at Corinth, with all the saints who are in all Achaia:
Some things to take note of: Paul identifies himself as an Apostle of Jesus Christ. Although Paul begins most of his epistles by referring to his being an apostle, in this book of second Corinthians this fact will turn out to be a very big item. Because it will come up later we won't go into detail at this point.
With Paul is Timothy. Perhaps Paul is intending to send this letter by Timothy.
The letter is addressed to the church but he includes other saints who are in “all Achaia”. Achaia was a province and Corinth was pretty much right in the center of it. As a way of reminder, in our study of First Corinthians we noted that churches mainly met in homes at that time. Obviously, in order for a church to grow, they had limited choices. They might have to meet in the home multiple times to accommodate the growing number. Or they would split into two home churches, then four etc. They would multiply by dividing. The system worked … to a degree.
A problem of dis-unity between the groups developed. The dis-unity centered on loyalties toward former leaders/pastors. Some remembered Paul and idolized him. Others followed Apollos, a pastor who stepped in after Paul left. Apollos was known for his oratory skill. Some of those who had Jewish background had heard of Peter and felt the church should be paying closer attention to including Jewishness into the church.
So there were many house churches in Corinth … and many more were springing up throughout the province of Achaia.
2Co 1:2 Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. This sounds like Paul's usual type of greeting … and it is, however we detect that Paul wishes nothing but the best for them.
2Co 1:3 ¶ Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, We are reminded in verses two and three that God 'favors' us. Not that we deserve His favor … He chose to favor us, in spite of our brokenness and sinfulness, and 'while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us'.
We are also reminded that that God is the source of peace. When we talk about peace, we recognize that there are two kinds of peace. One has to do with an attitude of quietness without worry and turmoil. God can give us that. But there is another kind of peace. This one speaks of the feeling one has when the two sides of a conflict (war) settle their disagreement and shake hands … declaring peace. This kind of peace also comes from God. God's peace with us came when Jesus settled the debt on the cross.
2Co 1:4 who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. Verses three and four also mention God as being the God of all comfort. Paul will build on this fact shortly.
In verse four we begin to see some reason, or sense, to the sufferings that we may be called on to bear.
I am a man. I have never had to give birth to a child, so for me to have said to my wife, “Everything is going to be OK! Trust me!” really would sound very hollow. On the other hand, any suffering that I have endured, recognizing God's nearness in it all, gives me something of an understanding to others who are going through it and it gives me the opportunity to speak of God and hope to the friend who is suffering.
2Co 1:5 For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also abounds through Christ. 6 Now if we are afflicted, it is for your consolation and salvation, which is effective for enduring the same sufferings which we also suffer. Or if we are comforted, it is for your consolation and salvation.
'The sufferings of Christ' can abound in us. The truth is, some of us bear a lot … others not so much. Why this difference? The complete answer may be given to us when we get to 'glory'. But Paul mentions in I Corinthians 10:131 that suffering or testing is given to us only to the extent that we are able to bear.
Paul alludes to suffering that some of the Corinthians are enduring. And he adds this 'conclusion' … I went through some suffering recently, and now I know why ...it was so that I could come and offer you comfort in it all. 2Co 1:7 ¶ And our hope for you is steadfast, because we know that as you are partakers of the sufferings, so also you will partake of the consolation.
Next Paul goes into some specifics. It is like he is saying, I know you are having it rough. But do you know what happened to me? Let me tell you about it.
2Co 1:8 For we do not want you to be ignorant, brethren, of our trouble which came to us in Asia: that we were burdened beyond measure, above strength, so that we despaired even of life.
Do you 'get' what Paul just said? He says that it actually got so bad that he wanted to die. When you read about Paul's travels and tribulations in the book of Acts you really don't get any of Paul's feelings. Luke writes about everything that happened .. sort of like recording history … but now, firsthand, Paul says he got to the point where he just wanted to die.
But when he got so low … he learned something. He says, 2Co 1:9 Yes, we had the sentence of death in ourselves, that we should not trust in ourselves but in God who raises the dead, 10 who delivered us from so great a death, and does deliver us; in whom we trust that He will still deliver us,
Paul may have had a problem fully trusting God. I have that problem. I will try everything in my power … but sometimes come to the point where I have to say, 'I can't do this!'
It is a wonderful to learn that there are things that only God can do … without our having to learn it the hard way. Paul adds one more thing to his 'deliverance from despair' … and that is that he knows others were praying for him. He says the comfort that he now possesses is a wonderful gift … and he takes no credit for it. He says, You Corinthians had something to do with it … you prayed for me.
2Co 1:11 you also helping together in prayer for us, that thanks may be given by many persons on our behalf for the gift granted to us through many.
The next few verses are little vague, but they will become more clear as we progress. These words may even sound a bit 'defensive' on Paul's part. And they are. Some of the Corinthians were actually charging Paul with 'duplicity'. (Saying one thing, but doing another)
2Co 1:12 ¶ For our boasting is this: the testimony of our conscience that we conducted ourselves in the world in simplicity and godly sincerity, not with fleshly wisdom but by the grace of God, and more abundantly toward you. 13 For we are not writing any other things to you than what you read or understand. Now I trust you will understand, even to the end 14 (as also you have understood us in part), that we are your boast as you also are ours, in the day of the Lord Jesus.
These words underscore that Paul is saying … “I did not show duplicity! I acted in total simplicity! Let me explain:” Verse 13 is simply saying, 'I did not say (or write) one thing … and now I am doing another.
And verse 14 adds something like this … “Why would I? I would not insult you that way. I love you … (You are my boast)
So Paul is insisting that he is a man of his word. But something must have happened for the Corinthians to be blaming Paul of saying one thing, but doing another, as if Paul were either lying, or uncaring of the Corinthians or just plainly, an untrustworthy person.
So what happened? Here is his original plan
2Co 1:15 ¶ And in this confidence I intended to come to you before, that you might have a second benefit——16 to pass by way of you to Macedonia, to come again from Macedonia to you, and be helped by you on my way to Judea
Notice the words …see you on my way to Macedonia and … see you again when I come back from Macedonia
He says, 'This was my plan … and this is what I told you I was going to do'.
He asks them, “Therefore, when I was planning this, did I do it lightly?” 2Co 1:17
Paul explains, When I plan things, I am serious. He says that he does not make plans according to the flesh. What does he mean? He means that he does not make plans based upon what he feels.
Or the things I plan, do I plan according to the flesh, that with me there should be Yes, Yes, and No, No?
This is Paul's way of saying, If I say Yes … I mean it. My yes will not become a No.
Why is Paul making such a big deal of this? What actually happened? Paul left Ephesus, was going to stop in at Corinth … like he arranged with them to do .. but then he passed them by and went straight to Macedonia.
Paul is very very concerned that they know exactly what happened. You see, if Paul passed them by because he changed his mind, he found a cheaper boat fare, or he was just getting a little tired of them … this would make him a man who does not stand by his word. This would make him untrustworthy. If he was untrustworthy … what about some of the other things that he has told them in the past? Could he be trusted at all? This could undo anything and everything that he has taught them so far.
What about us? Are we trustworthy? Are we concerned about how people view our overall character? Do people know that we are people of our word?
When a pastor of 15 years totally changes his view on marriage from one man - one woman for life and says, I was wrong. Two men can be in a marriage relationship, can his church be expected to believe anything he has preached and taught them?
Paul senses that, if he were to dare to be flippant or casual about giving his word, the truth of the entire Word of God is at stake here …. We need to take being truthful that seriously.
2Co 1:18 But as God is faithful, our word to you was not Yes and No. 19 For the Son of God, Jesus Christ, who was preached among you by us——by me, Silvanus, and Timothy——was not Yes and No, but in Him was Yes.
2Co 1:20 For all the promises of God in Him are Yes, and in Him Amen, to the glory of God through us
So is not just Paul's reputation at stake here. Paul says that 'to not keep your word' can even reflect on God's reputation. all the promises of God in Him are 'Yes'.
2Co 1:21 Now He who establishes us with you in Christ and has anointed us is God, 22 who also has sealed us and given us the Spirit in our hearts as a guarantee.
Here the apostle Paul finishes answering the 'the charge' that he is not a man of his word. In this last statement he includes the Corinthian Christians as well. He says, “Seriously, there is no 'lightheartedness' at all … God has anointed us with His Spirit.” This means, Paul is saying, “When I speak I am remembering that God is in me. For me that is a wonderful guarantee that I am His … but with reference to my ministry … there is no lightness or joking .. it is God working through me. So I did not lie when I said I would visit on my way to Macedonia. I was being very serious. So why did I pass you by?” This next verse gives the answer.
2Co 1:23 Moreover I call God as witness against my soul, that to spare you I came no more to Corinth
To spare you … Now we are getting to the real reason that Paul passed them by. Let's ask a few questions:
Why did Paul write First Corinthians? He wrote to change their misbehavior. He had given a long list of changes that expected the church to make.
Has the church changed? Did they listen? Up to the time he was going to drop in on them … he still had not heard. Therefore he must assume that nothing has changed. They are still doing the terrible things that he heard about. He decided that he better not go there. No telling what he would do when he got there. He had wanted to go there and 'bless' them for making the changes. Now, if he were to drop in on his way to Macedonia he would be tempted to 'let them have it!'. So he skipped them. To 'spare them'.
So … if he had gone there anyway … if he had 'let them have it', so to speak … he would be coming down on them as some kind of 'heavy' authority. As an apostle he could do that. But he does not like to do that if he can avoid it so he adds this: 2Co 1:24 Not that we have dominion over your faith, but are fellow workers for your joy; for by faith you stand. Paul affirms that we are all God's children … we are all working together for God's kingdom. We want to do that with joy.
2Co 2:1 ¶ But I determined this within myself, that I would not come again to you in sorrow.
Paul came to them 'in sorrow' by writing First Corinthians. He is not talking about coming to them in person.
So he is saying, 'Yes I came to you in sorrow. That letter was very heavy. But the intention was that you would see your mistakes, make the changes and then we could all be happy together.
It's a bit hard to follow his statement in the next verse, but let's give it a try:
2Co 2:2 For if I make you sorrowful, then who is he who makes me glad but the one who is made sorrowful by me? Paul has made them sorrowful by writing the heavy letter … but he is saying that he was also feeling very sorrowful by having to use such heavy language to correct them. So he asks the question … who is going to make me feel joyful again? It will be you people when you change your ways.
2Co 2:3 And I wrote this very thing to you, lest, when I came, I should have sorrow over those from whom I ought to have joy, having confidence in you all that my joy is the joy of you all.
Again he emphasizes, 'The reason I wrote such a heavy letter is so that we could fix things BEFORE I see you in person. By then we can have a wonderful joyful time'. That is what he wanted. But it wasn't working out that way.
Finally, still on this topic, Paul gives the reason he wrote such a heavy letter:
2Co 2:4 For out of much affliction and anguish of heart I wrote to you, with many tears, not that you should be grieved, but that you might know the love which I have so abundantly for you.
Paul's letter was a discipline letter. We should know that discipline is not something that a parent does TO a child, it is what he or she does FOR the child.
Paul was not angry when he wrote them. Discipline should NEVER be done in anger. If a parent disciplines in anger, the child senses that he is being paid back for what he has done. He senses that his parent is doing something TO him, rather than FOR him.
If a parent's response to their child is based on things like: “I've reached my limit … go to your room!” or “Ooooh, you make me so mad sometimes!” or “Alright! That's enough! To the woodshed!”, this is bad.
All of these are unacceptable approaches to discipline. In each case the only thing the child might learn from it is where the limit is … and when they went a bit too far. The child needs, instead, to learn what is right and what is wrong. That is done by teaching and modeling. That is what Paul is doing for the Corinthian church.
“that you might know the love which I have so abundantly for you.”
1 1Co 10:13 No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.
Here is an example: “ 1Co 6:1 ¶ “Dare any of you, having a matter against another, go to law before the unrighteous, and not before the saints?” …. and then verse 5 “I say this to your shame. Is it so, that there is not a wise man among you, not even one, who will be able to judge between his brethren?”
And another example: “1Co 5:1 ¶ It is actually reported that there is sexual immorality among you, and such sexual immorality as is not even named among the Gentiles — that a man has his father’s wife!” … and down to verse 5 “deliver such a one to Satan for the destruction of the flesh, that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus”.
He loved the church very much and yet he felt it necessary to come down on them with his 'apostolic' force.
It almost goes without saying that, his first letter being completed and carried to them … he would wait and wonder what their responses could be. Would they humbly listen and repent of their many church problems … their dis-unity, tolerating sexual sin in the church, arguing about who has the greater spiritual gift, in-fighting and suing one another etc.? Or would they read it and set it aside and nothing would change? Would he have to go there in person and see what is going on?
As we look at Paul's second letter to the Corinthian church we notice a connection to First Corinthians.
But let's just begin and allow the book to unfold itself to us.
2Co 1:1 ¶ Paul, an apostle of Jesus Christ by the will of God, and Timothy our brother, To the church of God which is at Corinth, with all the saints who are in all Achaia:
Some things to take note of: Paul identifies himself as an Apostle of Jesus Christ. Although Paul begins most of his epistles by referring to his being an apostle, in this book of second Corinthians this fact will turn out to be a very big item. Because it will come up later we won't go into detail at this point.
With Paul is Timothy. Perhaps Paul is intending to send this letter by Timothy.
The letter is addressed to the church but he includes other saints who are in “all Achaia”. Achaia was a province and Corinth was pretty much right in the center of it. As a way of reminder, in our study of First Corinthians we noted that churches mainly met in homes at that time. Obviously, in order for a church to grow, they had limited choices. They might have to meet in the home multiple times to accommodate the growing number. Or they would split into two home churches, then four etc. They would multiply by dividing. The system worked … to a degree.
A problem of dis-unity between the groups developed. The dis-unity centered on loyalties toward former leaders/pastors. Some remembered Paul and idolized him. Others followed Apollos, a pastor who stepped in after Paul left. Apollos was known for his oratory skill. Some of those who had Jewish background had heard of Peter and felt the church should be paying closer attention to including Jewishness into the church.
So there were many house churches in Corinth … and many more were springing up throughout the province of Achaia.
2Co 1:2 Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. This sounds like Paul's usual type of greeting … and it is, however we detect that Paul wishes nothing but the best for them.
2Co 1:3 ¶ Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, We are reminded in verses two and three that God 'favors' us. Not that we deserve His favor … He chose to favor us, in spite of our brokenness and sinfulness, and 'while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us'.
We are also reminded that that God is the source of peace. When we talk about peace, we recognize that there are two kinds of peace. One has to do with an attitude of quietness without worry and turmoil. God can give us that. But there is another kind of peace. This one speaks of the feeling one has when the two sides of a conflict (war) settle their disagreement and shake hands … declaring peace. This kind of peace also comes from God. God's peace with us came when Jesus settled the debt on the cross.
2Co 1:4 who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. Verses three and four also mention God as being the God of all comfort. Paul will build on this fact shortly.
In verse four we begin to see some reason, or sense, to the sufferings that we may be called on to bear.
I am a man. I have never had to give birth to a child, so for me to have said to my wife, “Everything is going to be OK! Trust me!” really would sound very hollow. On the other hand, any suffering that I have endured, recognizing God's nearness in it all, gives me something of an understanding to others who are going through it and it gives me the opportunity to speak of God and hope to the friend who is suffering.
2Co 1:5 For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also abounds through Christ. 6 Now if we are afflicted, it is for your consolation and salvation, which is effective for enduring the same sufferings which we also suffer. Or if we are comforted, it is for your consolation and salvation.
'The sufferings of Christ' can abound in us. The truth is, some of us bear a lot … others not so much. Why this difference? The complete answer may be given to us when we get to 'glory'. But Paul mentions in I Corinthians 10:131 that suffering or testing is given to us only to the extent that we are able to bear.
Paul alludes to suffering that some of the Corinthians are enduring. And he adds this 'conclusion' … I went through some suffering recently, and now I know why ...it was so that I could come and offer you comfort in it all. 2Co 1:7 ¶ And our hope for you is steadfast, because we know that as you are partakers of the sufferings, so also you will partake of the consolation.
Next Paul goes into some specifics. It is like he is saying, I know you are having it rough. But do you know what happened to me? Let me tell you about it.
2Co 1:8 For we do not want you to be ignorant, brethren, of our trouble which came to us in Asia: that we were burdened beyond measure, above strength, so that we despaired even of life.
Do you 'get' what Paul just said? He says that it actually got so bad that he wanted to die. When you read about Paul's travels and tribulations in the book of Acts you really don't get any of Paul's feelings. Luke writes about everything that happened .. sort of like recording history … but now, firsthand, Paul says he got to the point where he just wanted to die.
But when he got so low … he learned something. He says, 2Co 1:9 Yes, we had the sentence of death in ourselves, that we should not trust in ourselves but in God who raises the dead, 10 who delivered us from so great a death, and does deliver us; in whom we trust that He will still deliver us,
Paul may have had a problem fully trusting God. I have that problem. I will try everything in my power … but sometimes come to the point where I have to say, 'I can't do this!'
It is a wonderful to learn that there are things that only God can do … without our having to learn it the hard way. Paul adds one more thing to his 'deliverance from despair' … and that is that he knows others were praying for him. He says the comfort that he now possesses is a wonderful gift … and he takes no credit for it. He says, You Corinthians had something to do with it … you prayed for me.
2Co 1:11 you also helping together in prayer for us, that thanks may be given by many persons on our behalf for the gift granted to us through many.
The next few verses are little vague, but they will become more clear as we progress. These words may even sound a bit 'defensive' on Paul's part. And they are. Some of the Corinthians were actually charging Paul with 'duplicity'. (Saying one thing, but doing another)
2Co 1:12 ¶ For our boasting is this: the testimony of our conscience that we conducted ourselves in the world in simplicity and godly sincerity, not with fleshly wisdom but by the grace of God, and more abundantly toward you. 13 For we are not writing any other things to you than what you read or understand. Now I trust you will understand, even to the end 14 (as also you have understood us in part), that we are your boast as you also are ours, in the day of the Lord Jesus.
These words underscore that Paul is saying … “I did not show duplicity! I acted in total simplicity! Let me explain:” Verse 13 is simply saying, 'I did not say (or write) one thing … and now I am doing another.
And verse 14 adds something like this … “Why would I? I would not insult you that way. I love you … (You are my boast)
So Paul is insisting that he is a man of his word. But something must have happened for the Corinthians to be blaming Paul of saying one thing, but doing another, as if Paul were either lying, or uncaring of the Corinthians or just plainly, an untrustworthy person.
So what happened? Here is his original plan
2Co 1:15 ¶ And in this confidence I intended to come to you before, that you might have a second benefit——16 to pass by way of you to Macedonia, to come again from Macedonia to you, and be helped by you on my way to Judea
Notice the words …see you on my way to Macedonia and … see you again when I come back from Macedonia
He says, 'This was my plan … and this is what I told you I was going to do'.
He asks them, “Therefore, when I was planning this, did I do it lightly?” 2Co 1:17
Paul explains, When I plan things, I am serious. He says that he does not make plans according to the flesh. What does he mean? He means that he does not make plans based upon what he feels.
Or the things I plan, do I plan according to the flesh, that with me there should be Yes, Yes, and No, No?
This is Paul's way of saying, If I say Yes … I mean it. My yes will not become a No.
Why is Paul making such a big deal of this? What actually happened? Paul left Ephesus, was going to stop in at Corinth … like he arranged with them to do .. but then he passed them by and went straight to Macedonia.
Paul is very very concerned that they know exactly what happened. You see, if Paul passed them by because he changed his mind, he found a cheaper boat fare, or he was just getting a little tired of them … this would make him a man who does not stand by his word. This would make him untrustworthy. If he was untrustworthy … what about some of the other things that he has told them in the past? Could he be trusted at all? This could undo anything and everything that he has taught them so far.
What about us? Are we trustworthy? Are we concerned about how people view our overall character? Do people know that we are people of our word?
When a pastor of 15 years totally changes his view on marriage from one man - one woman for life and says, I was wrong. Two men can be in a marriage relationship, can his church be expected to believe anything he has preached and taught them?
Paul senses that, if he were to dare to be flippant or casual about giving his word, the truth of the entire Word of God is at stake here …. We need to take being truthful that seriously.
2Co 1:18 But as God is faithful, our word to you was not Yes and No. 19 For the Son of God, Jesus Christ, who was preached among you by us——by me, Silvanus, and Timothy——was not Yes and No, but in Him was Yes.
2Co 1:20 For all the promises of God in Him are Yes, and in Him Amen, to the glory of God through us
So is not just Paul's reputation at stake here. Paul says that 'to not keep your word' can even reflect on God's reputation. all the promises of God in Him are 'Yes'.
2Co 1:21 Now He who establishes us with you in Christ and has anointed us is God, 22 who also has sealed us and given us the Spirit in our hearts as a guarantee.
Here the apostle Paul finishes answering the 'the charge' that he is not a man of his word. In this last statement he includes the Corinthian Christians as well. He says, “Seriously, there is no 'lightheartedness' at all … God has anointed us with His Spirit.” This means, Paul is saying, “When I speak I am remembering that God is in me. For me that is a wonderful guarantee that I am His … but with reference to my ministry … there is no lightness or joking .. it is God working through me. So I did not lie when I said I would visit on my way to Macedonia. I was being very serious. So why did I pass you by?” This next verse gives the answer.
2Co 1:23 Moreover I call God as witness against my soul, that to spare you I came no more to Corinth
To spare you … Now we are getting to the real reason that Paul passed them by. Let's ask a few questions:
Why did Paul write First Corinthians? He wrote to change their misbehavior. He had given a long list of changes that expected the church to make.
Has the church changed? Did they listen? Up to the time he was going to drop in on them … he still had not heard. Therefore he must assume that nothing has changed. They are still doing the terrible things that he heard about. He decided that he better not go there. No telling what he would do when he got there. He had wanted to go there and 'bless' them for making the changes. Now, if he were to drop in on his way to Macedonia he would be tempted to 'let them have it!'. So he skipped them. To 'spare them'.
So … if he had gone there anyway … if he had 'let them have it', so to speak … he would be coming down on them as some kind of 'heavy' authority. As an apostle he could do that. But he does not like to do that if he can avoid it so he adds this: 2Co 1:24 Not that we have dominion over your faith, but are fellow workers for your joy; for by faith you stand. Paul affirms that we are all God's children … we are all working together for God's kingdom. We want to do that with joy.
2Co 2:1 ¶ But I determined this within myself, that I would not come again to you in sorrow.
Paul came to them 'in sorrow' by writing First Corinthians. He is not talking about coming to them in person.
So he is saying, 'Yes I came to you in sorrow. That letter was very heavy. But the intention was that you would see your mistakes, make the changes and then we could all be happy together.
It's a bit hard to follow his statement in the next verse, but let's give it a try:
2Co 2:2 For if I make you sorrowful, then who is he who makes me glad but the one who is made sorrowful by me? Paul has made them sorrowful by writing the heavy letter … but he is saying that he was also feeling very sorrowful by having to use such heavy language to correct them. So he asks the question … who is going to make me feel joyful again? It will be you people when you change your ways.
2Co 2:3 And I wrote this very thing to you, lest, when I came, I should have sorrow over those from whom I ought to have joy, having confidence in you all that my joy is the joy of you all.
Again he emphasizes, 'The reason I wrote such a heavy letter is so that we could fix things BEFORE I see you in person. By then we can have a wonderful joyful time'. That is what he wanted. But it wasn't working out that way.
Finally, still on this topic, Paul gives the reason he wrote such a heavy letter:
2Co 2:4 For out of much affliction and anguish of heart I wrote to you, with many tears, not that you should be grieved, but that you might know the love which I have so abundantly for you.
Paul's letter was a discipline letter. We should know that discipline is not something that a parent does TO a child, it is what he or she does FOR the child.
Paul was not angry when he wrote them. Discipline should NEVER be done in anger. If a parent disciplines in anger, the child senses that he is being paid back for what he has done. He senses that his parent is doing something TO him, rather than FOR him.
If a parent's response to their child is based on things like: “I've reached my limit … go to your room!” or “Ooooh, you make me so mad sometimes!” or “Alright! That's enough! To the woodshed!”, this is bad.
All of these are unacceptable approaches to discipline. In each case the only thing the child might learn from it is where the limit is … and when they went a bit too far. The child needs, instead, to learn what is right and what is wrong. That is done by teaching and modeling. That is what Paul is doing for the Corinthian church.
“that you might know the love which I have so abundantly for you.”
1 1Co 10:13 No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.